How I Freed Myself From a Toxic Relationship — and the 5 Steps That Made It Possible

How I Freed Myself From a Toxic Relationship — and the 5 Steps That Made It Possible Years ago, I was entangled in a toxic relationship that was slowly eroding my soul. On the outside, it looked “functional.” On the inside, I was shrinking. I stayed far longer than I should have — not because I didn’t know better, but because of what I couldn’t see: Ancestral loyalty. Systemic trauma. The part of me that believed love meant abandonment of self. This is how I found my way back — not just to safety, but to truth. And it’s the same path I now guide clients through: 🪞 Step 1: I stopped trying to “fix” the relationship — and got honest about my entanglement. I had to see that staying wasn’t just about fear — it was about loyalty to women in my lineage who also silenced themselves to survive. Once I named that, everything started shifting. 🕯️ Step 2: I acknowledged the deeper trauma pattern. Through Family Constellation work, I saw how my nervous system was replaying an old script: “If I can just love them enough, I’ll finally be safe.” That wasn’t love. That was survival. 🧬 Step 3: I worked with my body, not just my mind. Through Specialized Kinesiology,yoga, I mapped the way my body was holding the betrayal, grief, and self-abandonment. I didn’t talk my way out — I released it through my cells. 🐚 Step 4: I included the exiled parts of myself — the ones I had judged and left behind. The part of me that stayed. The part of me that raged. The part of me that begged for breadcrumbs. I brought them in, not out. And I wept. 🔥 Step 5: I re-chose my life. Not as a performance. Not to prove anything. But as an act of devotion to the woman I truly am — and the work I came here to do. That relationship didn’t define me. But it did initiate me. Why does this matter to you? Because maybe you’re stuck in a loop that’s deeper than logic. Because maybe your trauma isn’t just yours. And because no amount of mindset work will free you from a soul-level bind. The process I walked through is the same one I now guide others through in my practitioner training and 1:1 work: 💠 Systemic clarity 💠 Somatic release 💠 Soul reclamation If this speaks to something buried inside you — I see you. And I’m here to walk with you to the other side. You don’t have to stay where it hurts. You can choose something different. And you don’t have to do it alone. 🕊️