Dropping Rigid Expectations

 

Find Your Glimmers

Deb Dana in her book “The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy” uses the term “triggers” to describe experiences that make you feel antsy and withdrawn, and “glimmers” to describe experiences that make you feel safe and connected.

“Trauma reshapes our system so that we are more prone to pathways of protection than pathways of connection.” This keeps us in a survival state instead of a thriving state.

It is very important to be able to recognize both triggers and glimmers in your daily life to answer the essential question about your reactions:

“What brought me here?”

”What is the story I'm telling myself now?”

We can cultivate glimmers in our hearts and homes through connection, coregulation, consciousness, curiosity, compassion, clarity & creativity.

Think of nature, music, lighting, smells, breathing, movement, touch, foods, sensations, emotions, and everything and anything to bring us back to rest ~> connection and safety.

“Well-being is not simply the absence of problems, but also the presence of strengths,” Dana writes.

Our survival means understanding the good and the bad. It’s not enough to prevent cues of danger. We also have to activate cues of safety, i.e., our glimmers.

Let us know what your glimmers are!

With love,

Lelia.

Staying Hopeful

 

How Do You Manage YOUR Emotional Reactions?

 

Do You Trust Yourself?

 

Believe in Yourself

 What does it take to be mentally attractive? People who respect themselves and are happy on their own exude confidence effortlessly. When we love ourselves, we don’t spend our time second-guessing what others are thinking about us. 

We use our time working on getting what we want out of life. So taking care of our needs and addressing recurring negative thoughts alleviates the need to go to others for their opinions. Mental attractiveness also involves communicating well and respecting other people’s needs.

Of course, we want to take time to listen to others. Let them know we care about them. Honesty, respect, discussing our hopes, dreams, and fears can strengthen our connection with another person.

~Collitalks

Just Say NO

 

Are YOU being programmed for POVERTY?

 As a Self Sabotage Coach, I can assure you that although health-based self sabotage appears to be the most frequent form of self-sabotage, wealth-based self-sabotage is actually what stands as the #1 form of self-sabotage in most societies.

The movies and TV shows are littered with anti-wealth programming, which of course is manufactured purposely to program us in this very way. Nothing out of Hollywood is an accident, coincidence, misunderstanding, or chance happening. I at one time believed that the movie and TV screens were there to make our lives more exciting and fun but nothing could be further from the truth.

Come up to speed on what's known as "poverty programming", a subconscious mind control spell designed to keep people running east looking for a sunset......in regards to their wealth. Similar anti-health and dis-empowering mind virus implants are inserted into us, by our screens, as well. Our mind identifies and copies patterns in our environment and the movies/TV shows make sure poverty and struggle are associated with being noble, clean, and walking the high moral ground.

Come up to speed on what's known as "poverty programming", a subconscious mind control spell designed to keep people running east looking for a sunset......in regards to their wealth. Similar anti-health and dis-empowering mind virus implants are inserted into us, by our screens, as well. Our mind identifies and copies patterns in our environment and the movies/TV shows make sure poverty and struggle are associated with being noble, clean, and walking the high moral ground.

Do YOU need Others Approval?

 

Did you know Divorce is Being Sold to YOU?

Selling Divorce in the West Self-sabotage is often very simple yet hard to grasp for the average person. The truth is.....we don't control our behavior in the way we think or the way we're taught. If you knew how your behavior was manufactured by the repetitive content in your environment, you would really pay more attention to the repetitive content in your environment.

The people who have a great deal of control over us know that our subconscious mind is literally designed as a repetitive content identifier. Once the repetitive content is identified, our subconscious forces us to act it out, beyond our conscious awareness.

The people who do social engineering control behavior, through repetitive screen content, because they understand how the subconscious mind works......while the average screen watcher has no clue how their subconscious mind works. Whatever our social engineers want us to do, they simply make us see that particular repetitive content on the screen and we act it out. The repetitive content we're exposed to purposely, by social engineers, is always negative.......which in turn makes us easier to rule, manipulate, steal from, lie to, govern, poison and control.

Here's a good video explanation regarding how divorce has been purposely accelerated through screen media, to destabilize our society and culture.

Women are programmed in one way (mostly negative) and men are programmed in other ways ... yet always negative as well. More on this later. All on purpose, all by design, all without our conscious awareness, all well-documented cause and effect. As an experiment stop for a moment and think how many of your friends, family members, or maybe you also are divorced.

If you're curious as to how all this mental manipulation works and how to protect yourself from it DROP me a line personally at innerexpression88@gmail.com for more information."

How to Stop Chasing Ambulances

Have you ever thought about whether you want to actually enjoy living? Something to ponder on a hot holiday (for some) day. If you do want to enjoy I call it live in joy then you have to let go trying to please everyone else. You have to go beyond judgment. You can't go through life worried about what everyone else is going to think.

Believe me, I know this from experience. I was addicted to rescuing people thinking they actually needed me - -haha:) No these people did not need me. I needed them in my life to make my life busy and seem like my busy was being productive. Not! This is how busy operates. Dig a hole for 4 hours, fill it for the next 4 hours and doing this day in and day out wonder why nothing is shifting in your life. Well, if you did a hole for 4 hours then fill it how do you expect to build a new foundation? You cannot. It is impossible. Yes, you will be busy - - keeping the same old pattern going and getting the same old results and you will be exhausted which makes you feel safe because you are in the familiar zone. Subconscious loves the familiar. That is why so many people never accomplish what they set out to do or want to do. It really is work to hack the subconscious and put in new programming BUT so worth it - this I know as my truth.

Please do not misunderstand rescue for compassion. I am very compassionate and assist many people but I no longer rescue because I know that enabling does not help. No, it does not. Never has never will. I have officially hung up my ambulance chasing.

I had to let go of the judgment of others stopping me from creating a life that works for me regardless of if they leave my life. I do not assume that their judgments are true. My recommendation if the is true in our life that you look into your thought patterns, your habits, your actions work on building your self-confidence. If you think badly of yourself, it's easy to believe that everyone else is doing it too but really most people do not even think about us. Most people do not give a rat's ass about us. They are too busy doing things in hope of living in joy.

No, we can't control what people think about us there's no point trying that. Just focus on yourself. If you believe in yourself, these judgments won't have any power over you. KEY POINT: do YOU have to believe in yourself and if not what programming are you replaying over and over. If you want to know how to overcome being an ambulance chaser rescuing everyone when you should be living in joy I have much wisdom in this area - actually my new title I have just been given by my higher power is just that.

~Collitalks