Relationships have a tremendous impact upon expression. For many, their relationships oppress them because, in spite of their belief systems, there is an undeniable knowingness within them which says, "I have not become what I needed." It eats at them.This is why many suffer hypertension, heart disease, and stomach and intestinal problems. Ask them why they do not change their situation and they say, "Well, I have a family to support and bills to pay, so I have to work. I have to behave." And it is true that once relationships are established, they can be hard to leave.
How can you work with a stifling relationship? One way is to allow your partner to develop his or her potentials too. It is not always necessary to break up relationships in order for people to develop. Learn to give each other the freedom to be and to become. Support each other on your paths of discovery. At one point you might be the one who needs to become. At another point it might be your mate who needs to become. Or you may need to become simultaneously, and you can support each other in your individual quests. This can be a stimulating model for your children. They can observe and experience how you, their parents, are both exploring and expanding your potentials and consciousness, yet still maintaining a sharing, caring relationship with each other. The children may come to realize they can explore their potentials too, for you have not made them dependent upon set beliefs. You are not holding onto beliefs any longer. You and your children will have a much greater freedom and will be healthier because of it.
So for those who feel oppressed by family relationships, I would say that getting away from one another will not necessarily make you happy if you do not learn to activate your potentials. Before you look outside the family life or look for someone who seems to share your beliefs and ideas, you might first look for ways to express yourself as an individual within the family. You may discover that involvement with your partners, your mate and children, will lead to your evolvement. The key is to create a family which is mutually supportive. Continuously create a dynamic family environment which reflects and enhances your state of consciousness and health. Do not fear change. Do not use your family and your job as excuses or distractions to avoid personal expression. Do not explode -- expand! Otherwise, you will limit the expression of your partner and children as well.
How sad that many people actually plan to wait forty years and agree to spend their energy fulfilling someone else's desires before they set out on that path of self-discovery. For forty years they work to fulfill someone else's expectations of what is best for them. They wait until they retire and the children are gone before they really begin to live for themselves.
Forty years of waiting will not leave the mind and body in a very good state of health, one capable of allowing a person to develop her potentials. Often that person's "golden years" become merely a fulfillment of a new set of beliefs, an escape rather than an exploration.
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