My Personal

🔓 My Personal 3-Step Process for Ending Professional Self-Sabotage I want to share a pattern I lived in for decades: I was great at building incredible projects, getting featured on podcast,magazines and connecting with elite clients... but every time I reached a certain level of success, I would unconsciously self-sabotage my health or finances. I was always climbing a mountain, but the mountain always felt exhausting. I genuinely believed struggle was the price of success. But once I dedicated myself to tracing this systemic pattern, I realized the struggle wasn’t my destiny—it was a Hidden Loyalty. Here are the three core, non-negotiable steps I had to take to finally break that cycle and permanently end my own professional self-sabotage: Step 1: Locate the Hidden Loyalty (The Unconscious Vow) I had to stop treating the symptoms (like overworking, procrastination, or spending habits) and become a Detective of my own patterns. I discovered I was carrying an inherited vow that said: "If I succeed easily, I abandon my family who struggled." My success was directly connected to their pain. The Shift: I stopped looking at my behavior as a personal flaw and started seeing it as a systemic commitment. This shift takes the shame away and gives you a clear target for healing. Step 2: Trace the Systemic Root (The Foundational Healing) Willpower and affirmations were useless against this deep, inherited blueprint. I realized I needed a method to speak the language of my body, not just my mind. For me, that meant using Family Constellations to actually see the loyalty in action. The Shift: We aren't healing something that happened to us; we are healing something that happened in the family system. Once I saw the root event that caused the original trauma, I was able to gently release my obligation to repeat the pattern. Step 3: Integrate the New Pattern (The Congruent Life) The final step is integrating the nervous system. After disconnecting from the loyalty, my body still expected loss and rejection. I had to consciously, consistently choose success—not as a hustle, but as a safe, deserved outcome. The Shift: This is where we rewire the fear-based fight/flight/freeze response. My body and soul finally became congruent—what I consciously desired (success) now matched what my nervous system subconsciously accepted (safety). If you’ve recognized yourself in this story—if you know you’re constantly holding yourself back out of a deeply rooted, unseen loyalty—then you are ready to finally end that cycle. Believe Breathe Transform Collitalks Love and soul hugs